Stanley Chen, Period 8, 2/9/22

Stanley Chen, Period 8, 2/9/22

Literacy & Learning

Write about your thoughts regarding any of the fiction or non-fiction covered in class.

Reflect on any new information you have learned in English class by considering how that

learning influences your critical perception.

How is what you’re learning applied to any other classes/the world around you?

The exploration of nihilism and existentialism in Grendel has helped me reflect on myself and

my path ahead. In the past few months, I’ve noticed this unhealthy apathy developing for many

of the tasks in my life. This has even spread towards activities I enjoy such as music. I don’t

hate what I have to do, but even when doing the things I enjoy I don’t have the same positivity

as before. I have some challenges within my classes, but those don’t feel insurmountable. While

I am unsure about my road ahead to college, it’s not something that creates a huge amount of

dread like I expect it would. From time to time, I do experience existential dread but it’s no

overarching conflict and more of a passing question.

These challenges seem infantile in comparison to all the positives in my life. Unlike Grendel, I

still have my parents and friends who are able to understand me. I’ve become more social over

the past year and opened up more about myself. I’ve never been a very social person but

ironically over the pandemic, I found myself more drawn to people in general. I’m somewhat

excited to be moving onto college where I have to be responsible for more in my life and have

even more experiences to meet an even more diverse set of interests and personalities. So

despite all these things going right, why do I feel so apathetic?

In a nihilistic sense, this is normal since nothing truly matters. These relationships, as important

to me as they are and these people are to me, are not technically “worth” anything. However,

like heroism, their value is derived from what we give it and how we act according to our own

morality. Through our discussions on nihilism and how a purposeless Grendel was able to find

purpose in giving it to others as an enemy, I’ve discovered how to give myself a purpose by

wanting to surround myself with people but rather as friends and different lenses of life.