Wendy Li, Period 6, 3/1/23

 Wendy Li

Period 6

3/1/21

Modern Mythology 2023

Literacy & Learning

The story of Grendel begins with him questioning his existence on earth. He feels like he doesn’t belong anywhere humans are scared of him, while animals mostly ignore him. Thus, Grendel expresses his frustration by screaming at the animals and pointing a defiant middle finger to the sky. Similar to his experiences, I was reminded about growing up Chinese in an American dominated environment, which often led me to question my own identity. 

I wasn’t fully considered Chinese, yet I was too Chinese to be American. This separation didn’t hit me until I realized my dumplings were everyone else’s grilled cheese and my version of tomato soup was oxtail udon soup. In order to fit in, I asked for pancakes during breakfast and pastas for dinner. I even stopped speaking Chinese so I could hide the Chinese part of me. However, when I wasn’t able to communicate with my grandparents anymore, being “American” didn’t matter anymore. As all our memories together came rushing through my head, not being able to understand them felt like I purposely threw away a portion of my childhood. I always thought I had to fit into one category. Either I was Chinese or American. But actually the answer to my question was that I should have checked off both boxes. 

As a result, I dove into my culture: discovering backgrounds, interpreting traditions, and exploring dialects. This new information provided me with various perspectives to view the world. For example, the color red in Chapter 8 of Grendel symbolized war and bloodshed but in Chinese culture, red is the most sought after color, standing for prosperity and luck. Outside the classroom, I learned about how traditional Chinese medicine centers around the ying-yang (hot-cold) balance in the body, allowing illness and disease to fall on those that upset the balance. Thus, this explains the opposite water drinking temperatures, with Chinese people opting for warm water instead of cold. All in all, from celebrating New Years in February to having cereal every morning, I can proudly say I’m both Chinese and American.