Rayhan Mohammed, Period 7, 5/19/2022

 Rayhan Mohammed, Period 7, 5/25/2022

• Socio-political Consciousness

• What are your thoughts and feelings about issues of inequity, oppression, and/or power?

• How do you reflect critically on your own beliefs, assumptions, values, and experiences, and how these can influence your perception of self and others?

Recently, there have been events that have made me feel pessimistic, and I don’t know whether or not that is warranted or if my thought process is simply misguided. One of these events is gun violence like the mass shooting that has just occured in Texas. Normally, it is paramount in the aftermath of any tragedy to find out what could have been done to prevent the tragedy from occurring and how similar events can be prevented in the future, but I don’t know if that is actually going to happen at all. Shootings are part of the news cycle at this point, and that’s just sickening to think about. For the people who don’t want gun control no amount of violence is going to change their mind. The debate over guns is a debate of power, power that will not be easily relinquished. I don’t know what positive change is likely to happen. 

This feeling of pessimism has made me reflect on how I feel about the world at large. I don’t want to feel so terrible about everything. I’ve found in my own day-to-day life that my own personal outlook can influence how I feel about my day, and that the more I see the good, the better I feel. But is there any good to see in this situation? I feel fairly confident in my day-to-day life that I am able to maintain a positive attitude while addressing the challenges that I encounter and getting help when I need it. In my bubble, there are obviously ups and downs, but I think I can accept everything as it happens. But I don’t know if I should maintain that optimism about the world at large. After all, I believe that I have a large influence on what happens in my own life, as opposed to merely existing as a passenger in the grander scheme of things. Furthermore, I feel like being so optimistic about the world would be overlooking what I see with my eyes. In this situation, by looking at how many past mass shootings have happened and how they simply keep happening again and again, I don’t know if America is actually going to have a positive movement in terms of advancing gun control, and in fact they might even go in the other direction. Sometimes I think that being optimistic would be morally wrong in some way. My mind tells me, how can you see the events from Wednesday, and have hope for anything? Often I think that I have no reason to feel hopeful. On the other hand, I feel that pessimism isn’t productive, and that I gain nothing from it. I don’t feel as though there is anyone who benefits by me being that pessimistic, whether it's myself or the people around me. Therein lies my conflict: Either I am pessimistic and the world makes me miserable, or I am optimistic and I don’t know if that is an agreeable position for me. 

What I do know is that I can go back to my life after I worry about these things, and that everyone and everything that brings me joy in my everyday life is still intact, and right now there are children and families for whom nothing will ever be the same. I don’t know how I would deal with that. I couldn’t.