Jayden Huang, Period 7, 4/28/22

 Jayden Huang, Period 7, 4/28/22

Goal Setting & Growth

At this current point in time, what specific goal(s) do you have for yourself? Why?

How do you demonstrate resilience towards achieving this goal? (or these goals?)

How does the world around you affect your perception of this goal? (or these goals?)

When I first addressed this prompt back in October of last year, my main goal was to be able to maintain my motivation. In these last six months I feel like I’ve made good forward progress towards achieving this, but sometimes it still feels like I’m going backwards. This continues to be one of my priorities, as I don’t believe in lack of motivation being something where I can just flip a switch and change my behavior. 

I find that one of the biggest things that keeps me going is reminding myself of the progress I have already made. Previously, I would get little to no work done as I would constantly check my phone. I originally tried to prevent this by setting boundaries between times to work and times to slack off. I tried this out for a while, but it didn’t really work for me. I found that being mindful of my actions to be much more helpful. I realized that I really wasn’t checking my phone for any good reason, and I wouldn’t be missing anything by not checking it. Checking my phone became more of an annoyance than an escape, and I no longer felt inclined to pick it up every five minutes. This really helped me to find motivation as I was now producing work I could be proud of in a way I could also be proud of. However there are still days when I get out of bed in the morning and just do not want to deal with anything. This is my next target for improvement. I can accept that there will always be bad days, but I’m trying to gain the resiliency to push through anyway. 

With the college application process finally being over, I feel like things have slowed down from when I wrote my first blog post. Without the overwhelming atmosphere of deadlines and essays, I’ve started pursuing some smaller goals. After writing my second portfolio checkpoint, I realized that it had been years since I’d independently read a book. Now that I’m free to do so, I want to read more. I’ve rediscovered how relaxing it is to settle down at night and read. I’ve also started drawing again, something I’ve also neglected for years. I am by no means a great artist or anything, but I like having tangible representations of things I think about, and drawing is just simple fun. I’d also soon like to learn to drive, at least before I move away for college. While I don’t really anticipate wanting to or needing to drive in the future, I do want to be a capable driver at the least. 

When I look at the world around me, I am sometimes demoralized when I compare myself to others. Why do I bother with drawing when I’ll never be as good as others? Why can’t I drive yet when my siblings and friends are already getting their licenses? As much as everyone says “Don’t compare yourself to others” I feel that’s not possible, as everything in our lives is based on comparison. Summer is only hot because we know the cold of winter. Walls are only solid because the open air is void. I will always compare myself to others, but I am mindful that I am going at my own pace, and I’m okay with that.